This is an AI-generated transcript from auto-generated subtitles for the video Happy Hour: Radiating Kindness & Love With Each Breath. It likely contains inaccuracies.

Happy Hour: Radiating Kindness & Love With Each Breath

The following talk was given by Nikki Mirghafori at Insight Meditation Center in Redwood City, CA on January 30, 2021. Please visit the website www.audiodharma.org for more information.

Introduction

Hello, hello, and welcome. Lovely to be with you in this moment in time.

As we've been continuing to cultivate the categories with metta¹, with the cultivation of kindness, goodwill—a rose by any name can translate to metta in so many different ways: goodwill, kindness, love, warmth, friendliness—we've come to the category of "all beings."

Let's linger with it a little more because this can be a fun and joyous category of just spreading goodwill, wishing beings well. I'm going to use some imagery today to kind of loosen us from our usual conception of well-wishing. My invitation to you is to be playful with this, not to have a sense of, "I should be able to wish well for all beings everywhere, and I'm failing." Have a playful attitude with it. Really have a playful attitude. These practices, if we have fun with them, take hold a lot more deeply than if we do them as a grim duty, especially wishing well for all beings. It's just kind of an easy thing. See where your heart finds connection, where your heart feels drawn to, what categories, and in what ways.

I find this particular practice, the well-wishing for all beings, can be expressed in so many different ways. It can be heavy, it can be light, it can be very joyful. It really can be light; it can be happy-making. Especially if you're feeling kind of heavy and morose, it's like, okay, spend some time wishing well for others and all beings, people you don't know. You can just imagine them. You can just pull them out of a hat like a magician and wish them well—whatever works for you.

A practical aspect of this is if you're walking around, say you've had a tough day, and you go for a walk, start wishing well for whomever you come across. When you're walking the path, just wish them well. You'll soon find you're lighter, you're smiling, you're happier. I've done this practice in this way, and it's just like, "Oh, wow, I feel like I'm walking on clouds now." Your whole perception can get shifted. So don't fight, don't judge yourself like, "Oh, it's not working." Just plant seeds. You're giving these offerings to all these beings. You're just spreading petals of flowers, without any expectations. You just do it. Or plant seeds, or whatever imagery—we're gonna play around with imagery tonight.

So with that, I would like to invite you to get into your meditation posture and settle. I have to say, Neil, with your background, it looks like you're sitting in snow on your porch in the middle of snow. This is so funny. Oh my god, may you be well. May you be warm. [Laughter] I love the humor of it. This is great. And Forest looks nice and cozy and warm in his blanket. I love this. Okay, great. So yes, let's get into our meditation posture.

Guided Meditation

Landing, landing in this body.

Ah, how nice. How nice to just land and sit in this body, here in this moment. This moment of being alive, right here, right now, just as it is. Just letting yourself be breathed, being aware of the breath, of the sensations of the body.

And just settling, one breath at a time.

This moment of refuge, to honor and cherish, just as it is. Not needing it to be any different, but relaxing into this body, this breath. Not fighting, not resisting. Fully embracing, however it's showing up.

And if thoughts or preoccupations come up, be gentle. Let them be seen to be released. To be released in the current. No holding on, no fighting, no resistance. Just release and be aware.

As you receive the breath, I'd like to invite you to imagine as if the breath is being received in the middle of your chest, in your heart center. And with each breath entering your heart center and leaving your heart center, you find that your care, your goodwill, your friendliness is awakened more and more. It becomes more vitalized, more awakened.

You're welcome to use whatever image works for you. Maybe it's a light that shines brightly with each breath. It simply becomes brighter and brighter. It's not so much that you are making it brighter; it's becoming brighter on its own. Check this out. Interesting.

If the image of a sacred, holy fire works for you, maybe each breath is bellowing the fire, and it's becoming warmer, bigger, and more beautiful.

Whatever image works for you in this moment—and you can change it later, it's okay—allow this sense of goodwill to shine, to radiate. It's not so much that you are doing it. All you, quote-unquote, "do" is not get in its way. Let the inner goodness, the inner kindness that we all have—and we often get in its way, we're shy or scared to express it—just let it shine on its own.

A sense of goodwill touching, shining on people you care about. Maybe see that first: your benefactor, your dear friend. It touches them and brings them your good wishes, my friendliness, goodwill, wishing them well. May you be well. May you be happy. A simplified version of the four metta phrases: May you be safe, happy, healthy, and have ease.

Seeing the brightness, the goodwill shining brightly upwards, downwards, to your right, to your left, behind you, in front of you, all around you. This light of goodwill shining, touching you too. As it radiates out of your heart center in the middle of your chest, it touches you with goodwill. Ah, and maybe you relax and melt a little bit as the light touches you first. Ah, may I be well. Friendliness, goodness, may I be well. This light can lie like a nice warm blanket, embracing you and shining all around you. Any being it comes in contact with, it wishes them well, brings them happiness, goodness in your mind, your wish.

Oh, goodness.

Maybe imagine that you're a human being walking on this earth. Ah, and anyone this light comes in contact with as you're walking in your neighborhood, with or without the words of metta, just this radiance is an offering of goodwill.

Maybe you imagine you're a fish swimming in the ocean with this light shining from your fishy heart center. And every being in the ocean comes in contact, either directly or indirectly. Ah, is touched by this wish of goodness, of well-being. Without attachment to outcome, have fun with it. Imagining sharks being touched by this well-wishes, colorful fish, sea horses, shrimp, eels. Spreading metta to all beings that swim in all the oceans, all the waters.

Again, let yourself have joy with this. Maybe you're a dolphin, jumping in and out of the water with this bright orb of metta, shining good wishes joyfully, swimming and dancing in the water, spreading goodwill.

If you like, you can imagine you're a bird in the sky. Let your body be relaxed. May all beings that fly, may all beings that fly be well.

Feel free to explore whatever imagery works for you. You can be the rain that washes all over the world. All the beings it touches, it brings them wishes of well-being. May you be safe. May you be happy. May you be healthy. May you have ease. Soaking all beings with friendliness, goodwill. See what works for you.

If you are having a challenging time right now, it's okay for you to be the recipient of the rain yourself. Both be the rain and the recipient. Ah, let your body soak in the goodness, the goodwill, the care.

You can't do this practice wrong. As long as you meet whatever comes up with gentleness and kindness, you're planting seeds of kindness. It's all good.

Feel free to use any of the imageries that have worked for you in this practice and just stay with them until the end.

If thoughts arise and you happen to think about anyone, just wish them well. Share some mental goodwill with this being who's come up in your mind's eye.

If there are any judgmental thoughts coming up—"I can't do this," "It's not working"—can you meet the thoughts with kindness, with a smile, with friendliness? "Oh, sweetie." Don't fight, no resistance, just kindness and love. Radiating kindness and love, whatever comes up. That's all.

Just radiating kindness and love with each breath. That's all.

May we radiate kindness and love with each breath as we live. That's all.

Thank you for your practice.

Radiating kindness and love with whatever arises—beings, people, thoughts, ourselves. Just radiating kindness and love. It's all that matters anyway in this life.

Reflections

Nikki: I'd love to invite your reflections. What came up for you? Reflections, questions, what worked, what didn't work—it's all welcome. You can type them in chat for everyone to see or just privately to me, in which case I'll read them out loud without saying your name. Or you can raise your hand. Especially if you haven't shared for a while or if you're new, we would love to hear your reflections. Your wisdom is important; it's a gift you offer to the sangha².

Linda: I think I realized during this meditation that something I've been doing every day when I walk my dog is like a loving-kindness for all beings, and I think that's why I've been enjoying it so much. I started it kind of when COVID started, and I started making eye contact with every driver, and I just beam at them because, honestly, I'm happy to see a person. And I swear, now people look for me, and they wave enthusiastically, you know, big semi-truck drivers wave. I just got that feeling when you were talking and then being the dolphin in the sea, and I was like, "Oh, no wonder I look forward to it." It's beautiful for me, and I get so much enjoyment out of watching their reactions.

Nikki: That's lovely, just lovely, Linda. Thank you so much for sharing that. I feel mudita³, vicarious joy, as you describe your metta walks. It is a practice of metta. You are just—that's metta. It's not complicated. You're just smiling at people, friendliness, you're waving at them, which is so sweet. You're establishing eye contact. "I see you." That's lovely. Thank you so much for sharing that. It makes me happy.

Lisa: Hi, thank you so much, Nikki. I was imagining the moonlight as radiating the metta practice, and remembering it's a full moon tonight. So that was really—I was able to really connect with that.

Nikki: Lovely, beautiful. I love the idea of the moon, especially in Buddhism and Zen. The full moon is a symbol of a fully awakened being. So when you talk about that, I love the symbolism of the fully awakened heart shining its light of love onto beings. I get chills. Thank you, Lisa, for sharing that.

Nikki (reading from chat): Neil says, "I was like Tinkerbell sprinkling fairy dust of metta everywhere I flew." Oh my god, that's so sweet. Bill says, "What if my meditation isn't just visual but verbal? I have a fragment of a song that seems to work for me. Is this bad?" No, it's not bad. Some people are auditory. Some people are visual. Just whatever works for you. It might be fragrant; you might be giving fragrant roses to everyone. It's all good. It's a song? Fantastic. Go with it, Bill. It's a cultivation practice. Lovely.

Nikki (reading from chat): Jerry says, "I love the expression, 'radiating kindness and love with each breath, that's all,' especially 'that's all.'" Yes, thank you, Jerry. Yeah, it feels that way. That's all.

Nikki (reading from chat): Another reflection here: "My back was hurting for the first 20 to 30 minutes, and it took my body a while to physically let go. I felt very tense." No problem. I'm delighted to hear that you stayed with it, and it opened up, and you didn't give up. Just gently staying with it. My invitation is, if this happens again and I'm giving instructions about flowers and fishes, then direct the metta to your hurting back. Just invite it to relax. It's okay, it's loved, it's loved. It can be as tense and as tight as it wants to. Don't judge it, just love it. That's my invitation if this happens for you or anybody else.

Jesse: For the loving-kindness of all beings, it just seems a little bit more open-ended than the other categories. Do you sort of wait for them to come, or do you try and think about just any being?

Nikki: That's an excellent question. It can be either way, and there's no right or wrong way to practice this. Sometimes it might make sense to go through categories, you know, "all the beings that hop and swim," and you're kind of bringing categories and thinking about all the beings in that category. And some other times, it could just be kind of open, you know, north, south, east, west, whatever beings who show up. "Oh, people who live in the Middle East just showed up. Oh, may you be well." "All the birds in Africa just showed up." So either way, and you can choose. You might find your heart in some sessions is drawn to one versus another way, but there's no right or wrong. It's all cultivation practice.

Nikki (reading from chat): Jerry asks, "Does the being need to be sentient?" Yes and no. I think in Buddhist practice, we go with sentient. It's like, "May all sentient beings be well," all the beings that have consciousness. And then I think sometimes it's okay to extend that to plants and Mother Earth. There's a sense of embracing Gaia, this life energy, life force that moves through all living beings. So it doesn't have to be sentient, in my opinion, but you can practice either way.

Nikki (reading from chat): Holly writes, "When sending love out required energy, I switched to receiving love from those that love me, and then without effort, love went back out from my heart. It became circular, receiving and sending out." Lovely, lovely, Holly. Thank you so much for sharing that. Beautiful. Yes, indeed, this naturalness of giving and receiving.

Sarah: I think you're fantastic. Thank you so much for the space that you've created. Really, thank you.

Nikki: Thank you, Sarah. Thank you for being part of it, coming and practicing, being part of the sangha. The sangha belongs to you. You're part of the sangha. We co-create this together.

Nikki: So dear ones, we have come to the end of this happy hour together, practicing and cultivating, breathing, sharing love and goodwill with each breath. May you all be well. May you all share, spread, cultivate your love unto the world in any way that you can serve. May you all be safe, happy, healthy, and well. And all beings everywhere. Thank you.